If not, his emotional blackmail may make them feel uncomfortable enough to reconsider their choice of name.But whatever the outcome, I can't see how the relationship will ever be without bitterness in the future.Don't ruin the friendshipThe name "Clementina" will never have the same connotations for each set of parents, even if, to all intents and purposes, it is written and pronounced identically. Perhaps Graham should go round to see them and ask, with genuine puzzlement, what dreadful thing he has done to make them hurt him so much? Please would they tell him, so he can put it right? If they are getting back at him for something he's done, they'll tell him. They knew what this name meant to him; copyright or no copyright, they should have made it taboo for their baby.So I don't think the name's the issue here. Graham's friends could argue that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, and his little Clementina is totally special in her own right. They could say that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery But no "Like it or lump it" is what they appear to be saying. There's some woman tearing around London with a first name and a last name identical to a close relative of mine, and I always feel enraged when I meet her because I feel she's stealing some of the feelings of respect due to my relation.But what Graham's friends really lack is sensitivity and kindness following a bereavement.

I think they'd agree that she'd be pretty cheesed off, and rightly so.In some cultures it's considered nice and cosy if everyone's named pretty much the same (how many David Jenkinses are there in Wales?) But in England we like to use first names to keep us apart. There's no copyright on names, but Clementina's a fairly out- of the-ordinary one, and even if they'd called their child Clemency (a lovely name, given to an aunt of mine) it would have been a bit more tactful and, indeed, original. Sure there would have been the playground problems, with two "Clems", but just the knowledge of the different endings would have separated them. Graham's friends should be asked how they think Paula Yates would feel if a close friend called her own children Fifi Trixibelle and Tiger Lily.

Of course names are important.But clearly not to Graham's insensitive friends. Obviously, if his mother had an exceptionally common name - Emma, or Anne - he'd have no justification behind his hurt feelings if his friends had christened their daughter the same. And when anyone's given a peerage they whiz from being John Smith to simple "Norwich" or some such. There's even some kind of fortune-telling that involves names, numbering all the letters, dividing them by something else, and coming up with a figure that predicts the future. The naming of a child often involves a religious ceremony You're named in the eyes of God. In the Seventies, when dozens of friends joined religious cults, I always got confused when jolly old Julia suddenly shipped up as "Manjana" or goofy young Rodney reappeared as "Vishnu". Now his best friends are to call their new baby Clementina too - after an aunt When he objects, they virtually say, `Like it or lump it There's no copyright on names'. Is he silly to feel hurt? What's in a name? Much, much more than we think.

After all, some women still change their names on marriage to show a fundamental shift in their relationship to the world. that guarantees the non-impunity of the author or agent of a grave human rights violation."Marcela Pradenas was pregnant during that last attack Her daughter, Marcela Paz, is now a lovely 13-year-old. "She was fine, luckily, but how can I forget the crime that was done to me?". Graham's called his first baby Clementina after his mother, who died the day the child was born. "That was a big advance."The complaint she submitted to the European Human Rights Court states that the Lords' ruling grants impunity to Pinochet's conduct before 1988, and "violates the principle that any internal legal ruling must be interpreted in the sense most favourable to the Human Rights convention... Hundreds of people were kidnapped and tortured in those later years."After she settled in Spain, Chilean courts shelved her case because of lack of proof of who had tortured and kidnapped her, but they accepted that she had been kidnapped and tortured. I was never linked to any political party, but active in human rights organisations I was one of very few who complained about being attacked.

I think they wanted to use me as an example, a warning to others."The fierce repression that followed the 1973 coup had, by 1985, given way to a selective crackdown, she says, that nonetheless affected wide sectors of the population, such as the Catholic church and youth groups "They chose their victims carefully. Later she obtained Spanish nationality, open to any Chilean legally resident for two years.Why was it necessary to terrorise a young woman who barely remembered the coup 12 years earlier? "I was no one in particular. They hit me and burned me with an electric iron on my breasts, face and back. I passed out several times and they revived me by ducking my head in water. When neighbours came banging on the door they fled."In February 1986, Pradenas came to Spain, and within months was granted political asylum. She had denounced the first attack to the police and, astonishingly, was offered police protection, so in September 1985 she returned to her parents' house, where the third attack occurred."My mother had popped out to the shops and I was alone, and the policemen on the door had gone for a coffee or something Hooded men broke into the house.